Cookie Tossing Tuesday

Technicolor Yawn
Mariah Carey & Bryan Tanaka 

While surfing the WWW I spied this image of Mariah Carey giving a lap dance to her back-up dancer Bryan Tanaka during one of her concerts and nearly tossed my cookies.

For those of you unfamiliar with the term it means I nearly hurled, chased the rainbow, prayed to the porcelain God in other words threw up.

Nothing holds less schwing for me and a high gag factor than Mariah Carey when she is trying to sex things up, heck let's make that MC in general shall we???

Yes, I did watch the first three episodes of Mariah's World out curiosity for the train wreck value, but the wreck got stale and solidified how I view Carey overall, a self absorbed twat who is more boring than watching paint dry, and way more annoying than people whistling a happy tune in public.

Mariah's World does confirm the overall truth I have known about her for years. We just live in it. But we all knew that already, right?

So join me in one big collective hurl.

Happy Cookie Tossing! 

All I Want For Christmas...

No Fluorescent Lighting!
Mariah Carey

Right off the bat let me make this declaration that I have never been, nor will I ever be a fan of Mariah Carey. That being stated, who doesn't think of her song All I Want For Christmas this time of year?! Of course you do!

James Corden brilliantly paid homage to it in a recent edition of his too cool Carpool Karaoke series. Where it looked like Mariah's right breast was ready to cause a huge wardrobe malfunction the entire time.

Which brings us to the curious fact that I am watching her eight part series Mariah's World on E! It's the proverbial train wreck you can't tear your eyes away from. 

Also, since I have never really cared about or followed Ms. Carey's career, there are a few interesting revelations here and there. My personal gem was how former husband Tommy Mottola basically kept her under lock and key when they were married making her write music all the time and because of that she never really toured. Yeah, I never noticed, but apparently she didn't tour until recent years.

Then there is the usual diva biz, like only being photographed in fluorescent light with her sunglasses on. If I have to explain the reason behind that to you...I didn't think so.

Only five more days until Christmas, check out Mariah, James and a whole bunch of other big names sing All I Want For Christmas below!

Remember it's Mariah's World you just live in it at:
www.eonline.com/shows/mariahs_world