Michael's Musings

Okey Dokey Doggie Daddy
Michael Shinafelt

While this week has been fairly status quo, it still has had it's moments. Mostly like memories in the corner of my mind, or is that coroner?

Sometimes I think like a car I need a tune up, before next week might be a stellar idea. But there is always right here, right now - bless Jesus Jones and carry on.

AHS: Cult - why is a Lesbian afraid of a clown with a dildo for a nose?

Maggie Murphy was 16, she spent the whole night  on her knees. The more you know.

Let's take a look at a book. The Big Book of British Smiles

There is a story about me out there, it's called "My Busboy"

If your sexy and you know it clap your hands. Damn! mine are really raw at present

The Scorpions song Rock You Like A Hurricane has been on my mind lately...

If you pee in your white snow pants, don't come running to me

Who all is planning on seeing Mother! this weekend, like me? Raise your hands

Serena Williams newborn daughter has a name, it's Alexis Olympia Ohanian Jr. - say that three time fast

When it comes to ovulating on the catwalk, give IT a name

Speaking of IT, I am loving the desperation TV ad campaign that is coming on the heels of a stellar opening weekend and negative word of mouth

Pardon me, did I hear you say spinach?

Casey has only known booty call love her whole life. Don't be like her, or do, the choice is yours

Daddy needs to get some rest, so submit to him at:

https://www.instagram.com/michaelshinafelt/?hl=en
https://twitter.com/MShinafelt

Michael's Musings

Rebel Yell
Michael Shinafelt

In the Reality TV era of which I am a complicit participant, there are many things to consider. One of them should not be the dumbing down of people's minds. Translation: we should get what it's all about and not make it our reality.

Alas that is not true, witness the current state of affairs and who got elected POTUS and why.

Personally I can differentiate the "reality" of media from the realness of life, too bad most people can't. Shall we proceed? 

What a kick Melania Trump had to nudge The Orange Butt Plug of the US to put his hand on his heart during the Pledge Of Allegiance. If she doesn't have her Green Card already, hand her one for this.

Remember there are always going to be Weebles on the rag

Pinata Back Pack!

I fucking love Snapped on the Oxygen Network!

The press has announed that Fleetwood Mac tickets are going to be $800 on their upcoming tour. I love them, but not that much. (luckily I have seen them when ticket prices weren't a mortgage) 

Cheap airfare tip - United Airlines

Andy Cohen, Eileen Davidson & Bunny
Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills reunion part deux - aka bitch better have my bunny!

Pretty Little Liars returned with a vengeance. If you don't like it, well bite me, I do.

Hugs & Kisses to my friend Jackie Kilmer

Roach free water, delightful 

Dildos, instead of rubber bands will be used in spin class today. Not really. One can dream, can't one???

When you wish upon a star, it's worth a try...

Always remember when you annoy someone in an anonymous sort of way, Satan will take care of that.

I'm Hellbent for leather, does that frighten you?

I'm as real as it gets at:

https://www.instagram.com/michaelshinafelt/?hl=en
https://twitter.com/MShinafelt   

Michael's Musings

Want To Know What's Behind The Curtain???
Michael Shinafelt
Photo: Jay Jorgensen

This past week has been really boring if you ask me. Hey, my life is pretty stimulating it's the "important" events happening in the world that need to rise to a competent level of intelligence.

OK, there were some bright spots, and many lows. I will try to put some restraints on myself, even though that is usually not my style (I usually do the restraining) and try to limit the negative.

Are you ready boots? Let's start walkin'...

Nordstrom stock went up when they dumped Ivanka Trump's clothing line, made in China. Keeping America great.

I've been such a dick on a broomstick of late aka I've been speaking my mind and taking no shit

While typing a text auto-correct kept changing the word "dildo" into "soldier" - AC has one fucking hell of an imagination!

Lady Gaga totally blew me away at the Superbowl, her performance was brilliant. The most impressive part to me was when she caught the football and jumped with precision timing. Hell, I know I couldn't do that.

Betsy DeVos secured her seat as Secretary of Education. Two things. The first is I am so grateful I did not bring a child into this world, the second? Pink Floyd called it on their song Another Brick in the Wall apparently "We Don't Need No Education" 

Wednesday On Thursday  - I hated everyone before it was mainstream...

Did you know you can find my chat with Traci Lords about her clothing line for Pin-Up Girl on her website? Here is the link: http://www.tracilords.com/press/  our exchange is under the byline "Traci Lords Pin-Up Girl"

I read an article about how crystal dildos can heal your vagina and make it a magical place. Yeah, I know I don't have one, but who could resist that read???

Faye Dunaway & Warren Beatty are presenting the Oscar for Best Picture this year. Now that's gangsta!

Counting down the days until April 18th when the final season of Pretty Little Liars airs and we find out everything. It's the only show I am obsessed with, don't judge me.

For my money Moonlight is the Best Picture of the year.

That's a wrap peeps!

Here's where you can find me on the WWW:

https://www.instagram.com/michaelshinafelt/?hl=en
https://twitter.com/mshinafelt?lang=en  

American Horror Story: Hotel - Discuss

Werd!

Let's face it every season of American Horror Story divides fans of the genre pro and con. But they keep coming back for more? Why? Because no matter what your opinion on the individual seasons AHS captures something that gets under every horror fans skin on some level.

This season the divide seems to be a little larger in terms of pro and con. After all the shows anchor from the very beginning, acclaimed actress Jessica Lange exited after four seasons. Two of them good, one of them OK and another one tragic. Who took her place? Why none other than the multi-talented pop icon Lady Gaga - now that's diversity!

So I decided to enlist my niece and fellow horror fanatic, Kelly Waters to discuss what she thinks of season five "Hotel" - time to check in, Kelly!

MS: Before we start what's your favorite horror movie off the top of your head?

KW: Well, by far my favorite is John Carpenter's "Halloween," I've seen it millions of times.

MS: It's mine too! I watch it every year.

KW: Yeah, I watch it every year and all year long. I never get tired of it!

My Niece & Partner In Crime
Kelly Waters

MS: So, let's talk "American Horror Story: Hotel" - I'm really liking it!

KW: I fricking love it! It's dirty, raunchy...It's probably a little much for cable television, but I love that! Oh My God, seriously like the metal dildo, whoooooa?! My butt cringed!

MS: Well I didn't find it shocking, you expect AHS to push the envelope, but I thought: ouch!

KW: Yeah, it's like, wow, ok, we're taking it to that level.

MS: A lot of people were upset about Jessica Lange leaving. Personally I was actually excited, I felt it would take the show to a whole new level.

KW: Yes, I agree. I love her though.

MS: So, do I but Ryan Murphy always built the show around Jessica, and now he built it around Lady Gaga. It's raunchy, glamorous and over the top gory. Yeah, I like her in it!

KW: I was really shocked about how good she turned out to be. Because I was really unsure. It was like Oooooh, I don't know...I'm not like the biggest Lady Gaga fan, but I don't hate her by any means. She has definitely surpassed my expectations.

MS: You saw "The Hunger" didn't you?

KW: Uh, no I didn't

MS:  Lady Gaga and Matt Bomer were modeled after the Catherine Deneuve, David Bowie characters in it. We all know there is nothing new in the world and that people borrow from everything. There is nothing wrong with that.

KW: Right.

MS: Just put your own spin on it.

KW: Exactly!

MS: There's nothing new anymore, get over it!

KW: No, there is nothing original these days.

MS: Do you have a crush on Matt Bomer? I do.

KW: Oh yes, he is so cute!

What Are You Going To Do?
Lady Gaga & Matt Bomer

MS: Every year AHS always goes many places that are taboo. This year to me it is The Countess feeding her stable of children so she in turn can drink their blood. How do you feel about that as a Mother?

KW: Because this season is focused on vampires, it certainly didn't shock me. The fact that they are hooked up to to the machines and aren't being bled to death, did not really bother me. The machines to me made that disconnect, it wasn't like she was sitting there  feeding directly off of them. That would most likely make me a little more queasy. Or if she was tearing their heads off or something. But the way it is portrayed it doesn't really have the disturbing feeling for me. Now that I am a Mom I am pretty sensitive to that.

MS: So the verdict is we are both loving this season of AHS.

KW: Yes, definitely!

Say AHS three times in a mirror and see what happens at:
https://www.facebook.com/americanhorrorstory