Freaky Friday

Fangtastic!
Angelina Jolie

"When other little girls wanted to be ballet dancers I kind of wanted to be a vampire" - Angelina Jolie

You know those times when you are surfing the WWW and you come across something unexpected? Well today is one of those times for me, thus I hereby decree it to be a Freaky Friday state of mind.

For some reason know only to an algorithm a photo of Angelina Jolie as a Vampire came up in one of my searches. It was so striking that I saved it and foisted it upon my minions today, right here, right now.

Not to mention it fits perfectly with a quote from Ms. Jolie herself about her childhood aspiration to become a blood sucking freak. To be honest her and I had the same lofty goal as kids. "Yes" I to wanted to be a creature of the night.

Combined with the fact that the Maleficent sequel is opening soon, October 18, 2019 to be exact. It's a Freaky Friday concoction too delicious not to imbibe...!!!

Bloody Mary, Bloody Mary, Bloody Mary... say it three times and see what happens.

Angelina on Wikipedia -
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Angelina_Jolie  

Comi-Con 2019: The Eternals

Surprise!
Angelina Jolie

So what kind of monster would I be if I didn't acknowledge the one of the biggest, most influential entertainment spectacles on the planet Comi-Con in San Diego? What kind of monster would I be? I'm asking you? Come on you lovers of the fantastic, surely you can come up with something???

Lucky for you, you won't have to as I am giving a wink and a nod to it by posting this pic of Angelina Jolie swooping down on the convention Maleficent style to surprise all you comic loving monkeys.

Now Ms. Jolie I suppose was there in part to promote the upcoming sequel to Maleficent, but she had something even more devilish planned. "Yes" Angelina revealed she is soon to become part of the MCU (Marvel Cinematic Universe for the uninitiated) - she will be portraying Thena in The Eternals.

Like me you are most likely scratching something on your being and asking "WTF is an Eternal?!" fear not her is the explanation straight from IMDb's mouth: 

"The saga of the Eternals, a race of immortal beings who lived on Earth and shaped its history and civilizations."

Alrighty then. The Eternals is set for release on November 6th 2020, seems like almost an eternity...Ha!

The Eternals on IMDb -
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt9032400/?ref_=nv_sr_1?ref_=nv_sr_1  

Reese Witherspoon Sprinkles Fairy Dust

Don't Make Me Dust You! Reese Witherspoon

Do you believe in fairies? If so clap your hands, Reese Witherspoon is set to produce and star in Tink. Tink will be a live action story based on the temperamental character Tinker Bell from Peter Pan.

Much like Angelina Jolie in Maleficent, Tink is supposed to give viewers insight into "the story you don't know," and will offer a new perspective on our favorite Disney fairy.

Reese will be an awesome Tinker Bell! But please Reese, don't wear boots.

Reese on IMDB: http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000702/?ref_=fn_nm_nm_1

Angelina & Brad Sitting In A Tree...

Sizzling! 

In what will be their first on screen pairing since Mr. & Mrs. Smith also known as When Brad Pitt Left Jennifer Aniston - Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are pairing up for a love story that Angie wrote.

Details are scarce, and no title has been given, Jolie said this about it "It's the kind of movie we love but aren't often cast in. It's a very experimental, independent-type film where we get to be actors together and be really raw, open, try things." 

The mind reels at what that could mean, an experimental romantic comedy, perhaps with the title The Taming Of The Maleficent ? or is it more along the lines of  Blue Valentine ? 

Filming starts in Malta the end of August and their kids will be in tow.

Yep, Malta prepare to be invaded by the Jolie-Pitts!

I for one will definitely be seeing this.

Jolie on IMDB: http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001401/?ref_=fn_nm_nm_1

Pitt on IMDB: http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001401/?ref_=fn_nm_nm_1

All Hail Angelina Jolie

All Hail "Maleficent"

C'mon you all know you want to get down in a movie theater this Friday with Maleficent, starring the perfectly cast Angelina Jolie, yes, yes you do and so do I!

I have to say I am excited to see Jolie play the biggest Disney villain ever and transform into a Drag Queen, I mean Dragon, but really let's face it Maleficent is a DQ as a well as a bad ass and I am not talking Dairy Queen. 

When I first saw Angelina on the big screen it was for her Oscar winning role in  Girl Interrupted and during her press rounds pimping her turn as Maleficent she had this to say about it:

"I really, genuinely thought I was the only character who was sane in the entire film. And if you watch it closely, that's exactly how I was playing it: I am just the only sane person here. I was actually almost upset when people said I was so good at playing insane because I never thought she was insane. She was just incredibly honest, which, I guess, made her seem crazy."

Hey she will always be Angelina no matter what and that's why her fans love her.

Maleficent opens Friday, All Hail Angelina Jolie

Cutthroat & Shinafelt "At The Movies"

Cutthroat & Shinafelt "At The Movies"

In the tradition of "Siskel & Ebert" "Ebert & Roeper" comes "Cutthroat & Shinafelt At The Movies"...

Yes, the resident "Burlesque Biotch" and Bonaparte band member on "Entertain Me" Clea Cutthroat has agreed to discuss five upcoming summer movies with yours truly. It's time for "Cutthroat & Shinafelt At The Movies" In this case the balcony never closes and it's always showtime at the edge of the stage...

1) Maleficent

CC: This is a win-win in my book. A fierce evil bitch, with a bad ass head piece & perfect complexion played by Angelina Jolie. Even if the script sucks, you're sure to score some fabulous makeup tips for your next goth party, fetish event, or Halloween bash. (Who am I kidding !?! I would rock that head gear strolling the supermarket with stilettos at 3 in the afternoon, LOL) All Hail Maleficent!

MS: Maleficent is the best Disney bitch ever! She kicks the Evil Queens ass from Snow White, after all she can turn into a dragon and the Evil Queen can only turn into some old hag who hands out poison apples.

2) 22 Jump Street

CC: You lost me at 22. I may live in Berlin now, and have no idea what this is...but I don't even wanna google it. Is "22" the clever idea of a sequel to that hot-mess remake of 21 Jump Street? I'd rather spend the night exfoliating. 

MS: Me? I'd rather have my ball hairs burnt off than be subjected to this.

3) Transformers: Age Of Extinction

CC: Must I really? The title says it all: "Age of Extinction". Transformers, please go away. 

MS: I heard Michael Bay added nostrils to the Transformers this time so they can snort cocaine.

4) Jupiter Ascending

CC: I think that we should take the money that we saved from not seeing 22 blah blah, Transformers, and this movie and go to Disneyland!!! We can kidnap hot sexy Mila, all take pics with Maleficent together & get high before going into the Haunted House. Score!

Ok...Disney is still a bit more expensive than the entrance for 3 movies put together...but, we could at least go to the bar.  First round of margaritas on me! (Mila's got the second round for sure ;)

MS: Yeah! Margaritas and Mila, good times!

5) Sex Tape

CC: Whereas "22 Jump Street" lost me at it's title, this movie has already made a giant fan out of me. Two of my favorite things: "sex" and "tape".

Hmmmm, I would say more, but now I can only think about sex.

Well, regardless if I go on a date by myself, or with someone else, this film should surely lend itself to a "happy ending".

Two thumbs....waaaay up. Pun completely intended ;)

MS: My boyfriend and I made one of those, and we watch it when we...Hey, why watch strangers when you can let your inner narcissist out and get off on yourselves?

XOXO,

Clea Cutthroat

Join Clea In The Balcony & For Margaritas at:

https://www.facebook.com/CocktailsWithClea 

https://twitter.com/CleaCutthroat