Ding Dong

Well as most of you RHOBH (The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills) fans have heard Lisa Rinna is out for season thirteen. 

"Yes" I know LVP (Lisa Vanderpump) posted my "ding dong" byline on Social Media, and it's accurate, not to mention funny!

Once upon a time Rinna was a agent of chaos in a loveable, F#ck Up type of way. Somewhere along the trail of breadcrumbs she left she evolved into someone quite malevolent and increasingly problematic. 

Let's face it Minions she was downright uncomfortable and despicable to watch for a few years now. Especially this past season.

While I am sure some are sorry to see her go, I for one am not.

Hey Rinna, don't forget your broomstick on the way out...!!!

RHOBH on the WWW -

https://www.bravotv.com/the-real-housewives-of-beverly-hills

Hump Day & Chill

Twinning!
Lisa Rinna & Jackie Cox

Sometimes I feel whimsical and want that vibe for my Hump Day & Chill inspiration. Thus today we have Lisa Rinna & her doppelganger drag double (say that three times fast) Jackie Cox from RuPaul's Drag Race, naturally.

This was taken on the set of the Days of Our Lives spin off Days of Our Lives: Beyond Salem. While Ms. Rinna has been working my last nerve on this season of RHOBH, mainly I suspect to stir the pot more than a reflection  of who she is. One thing I have always liked about her is her sense of humor and fun.

When she is in that zone she is truly an inspiration not to take life, or ones self too seriously. 

"Yes" that is why this image is giving me all the Hump Day & Chill vibes I need to hit the ground running this Wednesday September 8, 2021.

Bend it like Rinna Minions! 

Lisa Rinna on IG -

https://www.instagram.com/lisarinna/?hl=en

Michael's Musings

TBT: Nerdy Boys Need Love Too!
Michael Shinafelt

So let's get something straight on this week's episode of As The Quarantine Turns. Things are never going back to "normal" thus it's time to get to work on your new "normal" - that's correct Minions now is the time to focus, not tune out. On that note, It's time!

All zoom and no play makes Jack a dull boy...

When all else fails ask yourself: What would Olivia Benson do? 

It's all in the flow of the hips

Superheroes wear masks, and so do you

Dorinda Medley on RHONY: I almost became an alcoholic! Me watching: Almost?!

I know what you did last summer...f#cking nothing!!!

Finally saw Joker, I was sure I wasn't going to like it. I was wrong, it wasn't at all what I thought it would be. "Yes" that's a good thing 😉 Joaquin Phoenix deserved that Oscar!

In an ideal scenario the President of the United States and the worst human being in the world would be two different people.

Woman Crush of the Week - Lisa Rinna, because her Pandemic Tik Tok videos are off the hook!

This week's go to catch phrase: Morbidly Obese

I can't wait to be able to start licking things again!

Are you fancy now?
Spill, what's your current mood? Mine is pizza!!!

Tell me your secrets, don't be scared

Here's where you can tell me them:
https://www.instagram.com/michaelshinafelt/?hl=en
https://twitter.com/MShinafelt   

Happy Anniversary Chrissy Teigen!

Together For 10 Years!
Chrissy Teigen

Since we need all the levity we can get at present, yesterday Chrissy Teigen proudly announced it was the 10th Anniversary for her breast implants.

"Yes" you read that correctly so she took to Instagram and Twitter with the announcement using the above photo and a caption that read: "happy 10 year anniversary to these titties and RIP to these teeth. 💕" Much to the delight of her fans and celebrity friends such as Lisa Rinna and Paris Hilton.

Might I suggest you follow Chrissy on Instagram or Twitter, perhaps both? She is a lot of fun, her sense of humor is awesome! Also she is a great cook as well. Now THAT'S a winning combo, if you ask me...

Celebrate 10 glorious years with Chrissy and her breast implants at the links below, do it and do it now!!!

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chrissyteigen/?hl=en

Twitter: https://twitter.com/chrissyteigen  

Current Mood

Can't Fight This Feeling!
Lisa Rinna 

This photo of Lisa Rinna motoring to a yoga class with a T-Shirt slogan that reads "Good Vibes" is my post Labor Day Current Mood.

I feel very zen at present as I sit at the computer in the home stretch of my recovery from surgery. 

Lisa is currently embroiled in shooting Season 10 of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. We shall see how the show does post the hemorrhaging of ruling Queen Bee, the other Lisa, Lisa Vanderpump. 

They've added two newcomers instead of one to replace LVP, Garcelle Beauvis & Rinna friend and ally Sutton Stracke. Which is leading to speculation that Erika Jayne may be out this season or demoted to friend of the show via a recent cast announcement for the upcoming season minus her name.

Oh the drama! Season 10 has barely begun shooting and woot there it is! 

Honestly I'll take a yoga mat and some "Good Vibes" over drama any day.

Namaste.

"Good Vibes" on Dictionary.com -
https://www.dictionary.com/e/slang/good-vibes/  

Michael's Musings

The Man Behind The Perma Smirk
Michael Shinafelt 

Last night I dreamt of  French Dip sandwiches and Gin Martini's - but it was actually my reality carried over from my evening at Musso and Frank in Hollywood saying bon voyage to my BFF Brittney before she high tails it to Dallas, Texas that is. We had a grand time at the legendary Hollywood eatery. Oh, and I do highly recommend the French Dip, divine!

Nothing brings a bunch of c#nts together faster than something that is none of their f#cking business - there I said it!!!

Lisa Rinna was sporting a new look at Erika Jayne's concert on the RHOBH that made her look like Dorit Kemsley's brunette doppelganger 

Who has the better booty Captain Marvel or Captain America? Inquiring minds want to know...

So when are they going to arrest the Game of Thrones dragon who started the Notre Dame Cathedral fire?

Wanna see something really scary? Asking for a friend.

A phrase I use on a weekly basis is: "Save me a bike whore" - the more you know

Spend time with people who have been there, done that

About Last Night...
Brittney & Yours Truly @ Musso & Frank

Bye, Bye, Bye "It's Brittney Bitch"

R.I.P. Tim Conway - a true genius 

If I offend you cry me a river, I'll bring snacks and a raft

Sometimes I wonder why. That is all.

The wicked run when no one is chasing them...there are so many names I could add to this list...

Goat Yoga, whhhhhhhhhyyyyyy?!

Psssst! I'm ten times the bitch you could ever hope to be, wipe your nose and run along now

Wanna be starting something? Follow me at: 
https://www.instagram.com/michaelshinafelt/?hl=en
https://twitter.com/MShinafelt   

It's Raining RHOBH

United Front
Kyle Richards, Teddi Mellencamp, Lisa Rinna & Dorit Kemsley

It's raining again today in La La Land, literally. It is also raining Real Housewives of the Beverly Hills variety.

In a season that is clearly on of the best of the show, number 9 to be exact, is knocking the proverbial sh!t hitting the fan out of the park!

In a clearly divisive season where Queen Bee Lisa Vanderpump is in the process of losing her throne as everyone is against her for her manipulative ways. Trust me she is - this is juicy stuff week after week.

While I know these shows are produced there is truth to the actual situations. Case in point? Bear witness to Kyle Richards, Teddi Mellencamp, Lisa Rinna & Dorit Kemsley hitting Craig's in West Hollywood.

These women joined forces against the Lisa Vanderpump in this past weeks episode and it's obviously their way of saying LVP is going to be taken down, wait for it...it's not going to happen now, I said wait for it. I know you will.

Stay dry minions!!!

RHOBH on the WWW -
https://www.bravotv.com/the-real-housewives-of-beverly-hills

The Real Housewives Of Coachella

Hello Coachella
l-r
Kyle Richards, Lisa Rinna & Teddi Mellencamp

In case you have been living under a rock, one of the biggest music festivals in the world, Coachella in Southern California is happening, right now, as it shall be.

What would a high profile event like this be without some of the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills I ask you? Answer me, I asked you. I'm waiting...

Half of them managed to hit the festival with chutzpah and of course fashion, "yes" a trio.

Said threesome consisted of Lisa Rinna, Kyle Richards & newcomer Teddi Mellencamp. See how stylish they look in the image above, I know you do. I follow all three of them on Instagram and there are some fun video clips of them frolicking at the fest - say that three time fast.

I also follow Erika Jayne who was there DJ'ing for Moschino. None of the abovementioned women attended her set. Things that make you go Hmmmmmmmmm....

Tonight is the season finale of the RHOBH can't wait!

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills on the WWW at:
www.bravotv.com/the-real-housewives-of-beverly-hills  

Michael's Musings

Color Me Curious...
Micheal Shinafelt

“Curiouser and curiouser!” - Alice, Alice in Wonderland

Considering the state of the world we live in, I find this quote from Lewis Carroll's Alice in Wonderland quite appropo.

Sometimes you wake up and feel like you have fallen down a rabbit hole, and other days you feel like you are in another dimension. It's all how you process it that matters. 

Enjoy your personal journey, you only live once minions...

Shout out to Lisa Rinna's Mom Lois on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. Seriously that woman at 89 is amazing!

Claim your slut box

Flan

There's a new movement happening: C#nt Power!

I dream of egregious cookware 

Turn the page for an alternate ending

Don't drop bombs (literally, metaphorically....etc.)

Please can it about Kylie Jenner's baby, seriously, you've all seen a baby before. Why is one from a celebrities vagina such a huge deal.

Congratulations to Erika Jayne on the launch of her book Pretty Mess 

Sorry Jennifer Aniston 

Hey Justin Theroux, I'm ready for our one night stand now

While I want a hot body, and have lost 30lbs and counting, I also want mass quantities of pizza

Ready Player One, Really WTF?!

Wake up and smell your _____ burning (the blank is yours)

On that note, follow me at:
https://www.instagram.com/michaelshinafelt/?hl=en
https://twitter.com/MShinafelt 

Michael's Musings

Want Me To Give U My Pearl Necklace???
Michael Shinafelt

"If I gave you diamonds and pearls, Would you be a happy boy or a girl, If I could I would give you the world, But all I can do is just offer you my love" - Diamonds and Pearls, Prince

This past Sunday the Oscars happened. Today is my Mom's 79th Birthday. Tomorrow is Friday...and the beat goes on.

If you were a dream, what dream would you be? It's time for me to cut loose, footloose with my most random of thoughts. You know you want it!

Frances McDormand had her Oscar stolen while enjoying her win at an after party. WTF was the perpetrator planning on doing with it?! Seriously!

Do you feel dirty now that you are out of the womb?

Fine as a swine, oink!

This shit is why I was a dropout debutante

I would like to expand a little on Barbara Streisand cloning her dog. I don't get the point of cloning, it's not like you can clone a living things soul.

You gotta get outta town and just grow those eyebrows back

There is a Good Witch in my life, of the male variety

So I took which Real Housewife of Beverly Hills are you quiz. I got Lisa Rinna. The more you know.

Adam Rippon, Adam Rippon, Adam Rippon

LA Zoo Story
Me & Mom

Happy Birthday to my Mom, Jan Shinafelt. Love you!

Yep, I have now officially lost 30lbs and counting, mic drop!

I am supposed to report to Jury Duty on Monday FML

Sometimes you need a mid-morning nap with a side of booty

Keeping it alternatively real, is there any other way???

Show me what's in your wallet at:
https://www.instagram.com/michaelshinafelt/?hl=en
https://twitter.com/MShinafelt

Monday Motivation

Hi Ho, Hi Ho, It's Off To Yoga I Go!
Lisa Rinna

Whilst waking this ayem and catching a wave on the WWW to what did my half awake eyes did appear? None other than Lisa Rinna of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills sporting the most awesome cheetah print leggings on the way to yoga.

Coincidence? I think not, since this morning on I going to my first yoga class of the new year.

How much more motivation do you need than Lisa Rinna seen engaging in the same activity I ask you??? The woman is 54 and has a body that women in their twenties covet.

"Yes" I understand I am a guy and will never have a body like Lisa's for obvious reasons. That being stated Rinna is more like a poster child to motivate me to not forgo my yoga class for some limp excuse that I could manifest at the last minute. Got it? 

Monday Motivation indeed!

Lisa on Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/lisarinna/?hl=en   

Michael's Musings

It's All Fun & Games Until...
Michael Shinafelt

Christmas has come and gone and now we are moving on up to 2018, ponder that. Thus this weeks column may be a tad repetitive, considering all the things that have led up to it.

Or perhaps it won't. Whatever, I'm rebel just for kicks now, might've had your fill, but I feel it still...

Wanna be on my level today? Climb!

Ever dance with the devil in the pale moonlight? Asking for a friend.

Current Mood? Fuschia 

My Mom visited moi for Christmas, best present ever!

Oh, we went and saw I, Tonya - loved it! Yes, that's a recommendation.

I gained a mere 3 lbs over Christmas, child's play, off in no time

Yoga put a ring on it yesterday 

Sex Cells
Me & Traci Lords

In case you didn't know I went to Sex Cells this past Friday to hang with the awesome Traci Lords

Where in the world is...(you know someone whose name should be here) 

Shout Out to my buddy Tom Connan who has a brilliant new single out Charlie - listen to it here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PIBZ5kklVAM

Speaking of Charlie's isn't A Charlie Brown Christmas one of the best Holiday specials ever?

Who the F#ck is styling Lisa Rinna & Erika Jayne during their confessionals this season on RHOBH? Ladies, just say "No"

Speaking of "No" that is what I say every year when my Dr. tries to convince me to get a flu shot. Guess what? I never get the flu and people I know who receive the shot get sick, Hmmmmmmm...

On that note, follow me and party like it will be 2018 the next time we connect. Why? Because it will be! 

https://www.instagram.com/michaelshinafelt/?hl=en

https://twitter.com/mshinafelt?lang=en

Meow! The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

Housewives Gone Wild!
l - r
Camille Grammer, Kyle Richards, Lisa Vanderpump, Teddi Mellencamp Arroyave, Lisa Rinna, Erika Girardi & Dorit Kemsley

It's time to sharpen those claws and crack open the Rose' The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills returns to Bravo tonight at 9 pm!

While Season Seven was a definite improvement over Season Six and the endless Lyme Disease and Munchausen blabber, raise a glass that Season Eight will finally get the Housewives groove back that earlier episodes of the show had. 

Yet who am I kidding. Even if this Season turns out to be somewhat lacking I will relish every second of it! Especially since this go round features the return of Camille Grammer, who was quite the conduit for drama when she was on the show before and I expect nothing less from her this time.

So tune in tonight minions and this time the drama isn't saved just for your Mama!

RHOBH on the WWW at: 

www.bravotv.com/the-real-housewives-of-beverly-hills 

Michael's Musings

Don't Bother Me I'm In Leather
Michael Shinafelt

As I sit at my computer finishing off a glass of Cabernet Sauvignon, my mind starts to wander and wonder - WTF is happening to the world?!

Sometimes I retreat to my Purple Room for solace. This week has sort of been the week I tuned a lot of the static out. One must do that these days on occasion to keep ones sanity.

Right now the only vision dancing in my head is that of hitting spin class tomorrow morning. That means this weeks thoughts may be a little tainted with a view from my bubble. That's the way it goes!

The La La Land awards, I mean Academy Awards are this Sunday. Note to self: Stock up on the wine.

Speaking of wine, just had a lovely evening drinking it and having nosh with Scott Jacobs, thus the glass I am finishing up.

Is Caitlyn Jenner the ambassador on behalf of the LGBT community to the Agent Orange administration? I thought they already filled the position of narcissist reality show star in the White House.

I still have to watch the premiere of the final season of Bates Motel, just sayin'...

Fuck the rain, I'm over it! 

Trump officially rescinds Obama's protection of transgender students. Where are the backwoods Hillbilly's from Deliverance when you need them?

Hey America, clean up on aisle 45, there's a pile of shit.

Feud
Joan Crawford & Bette Davis
Eden Sassoon & Lisa Rinna

Weirdest reality show feud ever? Lisa Rinna & Eden Sassoon on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. It's pretty Freudian. 

If you could teleport yourself by blinking your eyes ... where would you go right now?

"When you see something beautiful in someone, tell them. It may take seconds to say, but for them, it could last a lifetime"

What's your safe word? Mine is flan.

And with that revelation I am off this electronic device and onto another one.

Bare witness to me at:

https://www.instagram.com/michaelshinafelt/?hl=en
https://twitter.com/MShinafelt   

Zero F#@ks Given - Lisa Rinna

Not Giving A F#@k
Lisa Rinna

Whatever your take on Real Housewife of Beverly Hills Lisa Rinna is, I think we can all  agree on one thing, the woman has chutzpah! 

Recently during some down time in her hotel room Rinna decided to take a nude selfie and post it on Instagram. Then she had second thoughts and took it down, then she did what Lisa does, put it back up with the caption:

“It’s back, I got scared then I said I’m 53 — zero f--ks given! Cheers to @playboy for going back to nudes. The female body is so beautiful, every size and every age. Be proud! #thefemalebodyisbeautiful #allshapesandsizes #loveyourself #loveyourbody.”

Yes, Lisa is 53 and she looks amazing, quite inspiring I must say. If this is what putting Xanax in your smoothies does I'm going to start that regime pronto!

It's Tuesday, and aren't you happy?!

Lisa on Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/lisarinna/?hl=en