Michael's Musings

A Little Bit Dramatic
Michael Shinafelt

Even though the photo above states that I am "dramatic" at present, I am actually, quite assuredly not in the zone. Quite the contrary, I am hunkering down and staying in as much as possible during this time per request and Netflix and chilling and really enjoying it 😊

The only thing "dramatic" are some of the things I am viewing other than that, drama free is the phrase I would use to best describe life, right here, right now. How's your quarantine going?

If Trump was smart he'd drop the election fraud nonsense and launch a reality show where his three children battle over one Presidential Pardon...

BTW I know what you saw upset you, sarcasm won't change that

Time to settle down and plot your next move

Binged all of Ratched finally, I'll simply leave it at that

Matt Bomer just streaked through my mind, hope he lingers longer next go

Stop singing, you're making me hate Christmas

Just In: The COVID vaccine will NOT contain a microchip, it instead will contain the new U2 album

It's time to wash that elf on a shelf right out of your hair...tis the season

Woman Crush of the Week - My friend Ashley Park who is currently in post production on her horror film Stay and has an Indiegogo campaign for her latest venture kindlyTV, which is something the world needs more of. Check it out at the link provided  - https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/kindlytv?fbclid=IwAR3BKahJkT_x3wQXF09Xzl2SA-Xn2PfC9UtcG66uDqqjvWbwgAxgEADxyoo#/

Watched The Prom on Netflix, I really enjoyed it, it had a lot of heart

It's over even if the Fat Man won't sing

Happy Holidays to everyone except Grandpa Joe, he knows why

How to ride a unicorn...discuss

Tomorrow is my Birthday FYI

Come celebrate with me at:

https://www.instagram.com/michaelshinafelt/?hl=en

https://twitter.com/MShinafelt   

Michael's Musings

TBT: Nerdy Boys Need Love Too!
Michael Shinafelt

So let's get something straight on this week's episode of As The Quarantine Turns. Things are never going back to "normal" thus it's time to get to work on your new "normal" - that's correct Minions now is the time to focus, not tune out. On that note, It's time!

All zoom and no play makes Jack a dull boy...

When all else fails ask yourself: What would Olivia Benson do? 

It's all in the flow of the hips

Superheroes wear masks, and so do you

Dorinda Medley on RHONY: I almost became an alcoholic! Me watching: Almost?!

I know what you did last summer...f#cking nothing!!!

Finally saw Joker, I was sure I wasn't going to like it. I was wrong, it wasn't at all what I thought it would be. "Yes" that's a good thing 😉 Joaquin Phoenix deserved that Oscar!

In an ideal scenario the President of the United States and the worst human being in the world would be two different people.

Woman Crush of the Week - Lisa Rinna, because her Pandemic Tik Tok videos are off the hook!

This week's go to catch phrase: Morbidly Obese

I can't wait to be able to start licking things again!

Are you fancy now?
Spill, what's your current mood? Mine is pizza!!!

Tell me your secrets, don't be scared

Here's where you can tell me them:
https://www.instagram.com/michaelshinafelt/?hl=en
https://twitter.com/MShinafelt   

Michael's Musings

Look! I'm A Push Me Pull You!!!
Michael Shinafelt

On this weeks saga of As The Quarantine Turns - Social Summer has officially been cancelled.? "Yes" Minions California has Stay At Home orders until September. Which is just as well because here in the land of lock down, while I have been exercising, it's not the gym and I have been eating out of boredom. Thus I don't have the Social Summer Body I would have wanted. There's always an upside!

This week's Netflix & Chill is a recommendation from my niece, Lindley Waters, "You" good call Lindley, I love it! Season Two is even better than the first!

Tik Tok is making a lot of hot people truly not do-able

Let's discuss our most  mundane celebrity encounters, shall we? Mine was with Julianne Moore at the now defunct Rexall on Beverly and LaCienega. I told her how much I loved one of her first films Safe, she smiled and said Thank You, then we moved on.

Sweat sock opera gloves, discuss...

This season of Vanderpump Rules feels like it's been on since the beginning of time. In case you were wondering, that is not a compliment.

If you like classic movies, check out this blog a friend of mine does: https://www.jaysclassicmovieblog.com/

Shout out to the Thirst Responders (FYI not a typo)

During this time don't be a conversation killer. Seriously you don't want to be that person

Woman Crush of the Week - Shay Mitchell in You, she gives a deliciously bitchy performance as Peach Salinger 

There's nothing wrong with pretending your apartment is a piano bar and putting a tip jar on the end table, nothing at all

I had a dream with a lot of Cats & Dogs in it last night, that's all I remember about it, other than it was a pleasant one 😊

This weeks go to catch phrase: "Why don't you ask China that?"

I'm having a big bowl of frozen blueberries for breakfast, "Yes" I'm living my best life

My favorite thing about this time and place in the history of the world is ________ your assignment is to fill in the blank, surely you have something you like about it.

Wanna tell me what that was? You can find me here:
https://www.instagram.com/michaelshinafelt/?hl=en
https://twitter.com/MShinafelt  

Celebrate! It's Cinco de Mayo!

Happy Cinco de Mayo! You have now entered The Twilight Zone!

Have fun, but be safe.

Cinco de Mayo on Wikipedia -
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cinco_de_Mayo

Michael's Musings

Vogue???
Michael Shinafelt

In this week's episode of As The Quarantine Turns it's been Netflix & Chill all the way Minions. Hey, I had to see Tiger King to find out what the deal was. Then there was the Chilling Adventures of Sabrina, Grace & Frankie and Santa Clarita Diet... and many more to come.

Thus I bet you can tell you are headed for a lot of opinions this week, oh yes you are!

My take away from Tiger King? Carole Baskin totally knows what happened to her husband and had something to do with it.

That Geico commercial with Ratt makes me laugh every time I see it

I burned my last F#ck a fortnight ago

Santa Clarita Diet is off the wall fun! You haven't lived until you've seen Drew Barrymore biting a guys fingers off!

"We can't always choose the music life plays for us, but we can choose how we dance to it" - Unknown 

Has anyone ever tuned into an Instagram Live and thought: "That was worth it?"

A random marker of time, anyone?

The less said about the Jane Fonda/Lily Tomlin starer Grace & Frankie, the better

Woman Crush of the Week - Cherie Currie her star studded solo album "Blvds of Splendor" is out now. Order it here: https://music.apple.com/us/album/blvds-of-splendor/1506715461

If there's one thing worse than Chlamydia, it's Florida 

Whatever joke you are telling the punchline should be: Flan (Yeah, it's an inside joke, sorry, not sorry) 

Chilling Adventures of Sabrina is a lot like Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Edgy, dark, funny, topical and smart 😈 "Yes" that is a recommendation.

Must all things be filled? 

Time to move from the desk to the sofa

Follow me there and everywhere else at:

https://www.instagram.com/michaelshinafelt/?hl=en

https://twitter.com/MShinafelt    

Surfin' Bird!

Surfin' Butler!
Gerard Butler

"A-well-a everybody's heard about the bird!, Bird bird bird, b-bird's the word" Surfin' Bird, The Trashmen 

You've heard of the Surfin' Bird, now there is the Surfin' Butler, Gerard Butler that is. In the midst of a Los Angeles heat wave Gerard was caught surf board handed heading to the ocean in Malibu.

Funny my understanding was the beaches had been shuttered and no bueno with regard to inhabiting them, but I'm guessing if you are a resident???

Moving on, Gerard is looking good in his quarantine scruff and unkempt hair, and then there's the matter of his wet suit, it seems to me Gerard's not so little friend would like to say "Hello" and Happy Monday!

Indeed...

Gerard on IG -
https://www.instagram.com/gerardbutler/?hl=en

I Am The "Tiger King"

Exotic
Rob Lowe

I have a confession to make, I have not seen Tiger King. Yet, because of the wonder of Social Media I feel like I have. Yeah, there's that. 

Well the media frenzy has extended to celebs dressing like Joe Exotic during their quarantine downtime. File that under things to do in Hollywood when one is bored.

My pick for the best Joe Exotic get up is Rob Lowe pictured above. It's pretty eerie, and there's a feral intensity to Rob that really shouts "Exotic."

Thus it makes perfect sense that he and the ubiquitous Ryan Murphy are developing their own version of the truth is stranger than fiction story.

Hey, sounds good to me, and aren't you happy???

Rob on IG -
https://www.instagram.com/roblowe/?hl=en   

Michael's Musings

As The Quarantine Turns
Michael Shinafelt

This weeks episode of As The Quarantine Turns clearly has me doing something many of you have more than likely done too. That's correct minions, it's called going through all of your old photos as you can see by this weeks image of myself, I have clearly been doing just that.

Once upon a time I used to bleach what was left of my hair blonde. I did have more fun, and it looked groovy, onward with this weeks tomfoolery buttercups.

It's Purple Monkey Time, woot!

Florida beaches are now open. I'll  just leave that here.

I can deal with your problem, or rock out. But I can't do both

The season finale of  Law and Order: SVU is on tonight, while I can't wait I am riding on a bummer there will be no other new ones until who knows when 😞

Four months in and 2020 feels like 2024

Some sweet news - See's Candy is slowly resuming operations

Now for some frivolous news - It's official I can't stand new addition to The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, Sutton Stracke, ugh, simply ugh!

Pets are smarter than people, because pets don't hate people over politics

Woman Crush of the Week - Fiona Apple, she made "Fetch" happen with her latest album Fetch The Bolt Cutters

Jack Nicholson recently turned 80, I love me some Jack, what a great actor

All I want is a Disco Stick 

Yesterday was the day when people who were flying private roughly a month ago made social media posts about Earth Day

Also happened yesterday, the title of the Hunter S. Thompson novel Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas took on a whole new meaning. Think about it, but not too much...

Pizza is my latest food group during quarantine

Join me for a Pepperoni/Jalapeno won't you? at:
https://www.instagram.com/michaelshinafelt/?hl=en
https://twitter.com/MShinafelt.

The Quarantine Shuffle

Wonder Woman
Lynda Carter

Like most of us I have been watching way more TV of late. Hey, what are we Corn Teen minions supposed to do with limited options???

Well yesterday while channel surfing I struck Television Gold! "Yes" I was feeling my inner Yukon Cornelius when I stumbled upon a two part Batman episode with Julie Newmar as the Catwoman on, followed by an episode of Wonder Woman with Lynda Carter and Lyle Waggoner. 

The thing I remembered most about these shows from my days of yore was that they were silly fun. What I really did not recall was how skilled the actors were in bringing depth to that silliness. 

Catwoman
Julie Newmar

Julie Newmar brought surprising pathos to her performance as the kinky Catwoman, even though the material she was given on Batman was pure camp on a stick, Ms. Newmar really understood what she was doing and how to elevate it. 

Likewise Lynda Carter as Wonder Woman and Lyle Waggoner as Major Steve Trevor. They all elevated something silly into something magic.

I truly enjoyed rediscovering these two old friends, sometimes The Quarantine Shuffle isn't too shabby.

Wonder Woman on IMDb -

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0074074/?ref_=nv_sr_srsg_6

Batman on IMDb -

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0059968/?ref_=nm_knf_i1

It's A Bird, It's A Plane, It's "The Aquabats!"

THE AQUABATS!

What better way to start than with a pair of singles from everyone's favorite crime-fighting superheroes, The Aquabats!.  The first single, "Pajamazon!," is available now and it's the perfect upbeat theme to help get you through these quarantined days.  The band addresses the positives of staying inside while combining sax and trumpets with insanely catchy lyrics.  It's the first taste of The Aquabats' first studio album since 2011 and the family-friendly swinger the world needs.

The band's second single, "No One Wants to Party!" comes out on May 1st and it sees the band trying to figure out why no one wants to party at their place. Could it be the man-bun?  Both singles are from the band's upcoming eighth album, Kooky Spooky...In Stereo, which is scheduled for a summer release and will be available on CD and LP as well.

Michael's Musings

The Quarantine Shuffle
Michael Shinafelt

In this weeks episode of As The Quarantine Turns I got stimulated yesterday. "Yes" that's correct minions, my stimulus check got deposited directly into my bank account. Thanks Nancy Pelosi!

What's that? Yeah, it's time to move sideways, as the world is these days...

WTF? This week on Vanderpump Rules why don't we do an infomercial for LVP's cocktail garden at Caesars Palace? That's exactly what they did, blech!

Overheard: I am not arm candy, I don't shave my pu$$y 

Behind every sh!tty meme is a person that tried to make you smile

You think Quarantine is bad check out the Puddle Of Mudd cover of the Nirvana classic About A Girl. My ears are still bleeding!

Need a mask? A B Cup works better than a D Cup. That is all.

#TBT #ThrowbackThursday Remembering the days when you could find toilet paper at the crocery store - sigh

The longer Quarantine goes, don't you think Jack Nicholson held it together pretty well in The Shining?

Don't let the cat out, no matter what it tells you

Woman Crush of the Week - Dua Lipa because Future Nostalgia is music to my ears

If last night's premiere episode of this season of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills is any indicator of how the rest of it is going to go - I'm all in!

Give it a name: It's called self care

It took a pandemic for me to learn _________ tell me, by filling in the blank

My new home school

Guess what I'm wearing at present, guess

Find out the answer to that here:
https://www.instagram.com/michaelshinafelt/?hl=en
https://twitter.com/MShinafelt  

Hump Day & Chill

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Bang A Pot & Give A Yell!

Clan, Clang, Clang Went The Pot...
Sarah Silverman 

Apparently there is a new tradition happening in NYC during this time of quarantine. The citizens of the Big Apple take to their balconies at a designated time and bang pots and yell in support of essential workers "healthcare workers, delivery store workers and delivery people."

What a great way to boost morale in the hard hit city. Above we see Sarah Silverman enthusiastically joining her fellow New Yorkers in the much deserved recognition. 

Thus I leave you with this notion, try to do something every day that helps put a smile on you and other peoples faces. Trust me it is amazing. The few times I venture out during the week I always smile at people as I pass them on the street or shop side by side with them for groceries.

It's a simple yet powerful thing to do.

Keep on keeping minions!

Sarah on IG -
https://www.instagram.com/sarahkatesilverman/?hl=en

Happy Easter Lockdown

It's All An Illusion...
Michael Shinafelt

My name is Michael, I'll be your Easter Bunny today, give it up do as I say, give it up and let me have my eggs...

This is my current Easter Mood, black & white, with the beautiful Los Angeles skyline in the background and a mysterious bunny, that is symbolizing who knows what?

While times are uncertain, there is still beauty in the world and this captures all of that and more, depending on what you take from it.

Honestly I felt like Frank the bunny from Donnie Darko when this was shot. However I don't believe the world is that bleak, I always choose the ray of light over the darkness. That doesn't mean I don't have my moments, I am realistic, but my will and belief in the good of others is strong.

Wishing you and yours the best. 

Happy Easter from Michael Bunny!

Hop to it with me here -
https://www.instagram.com/michaelshinafelt/?hl=en
https://twitter.com/MShinafelt  

Virtual(ly) "No Exit"

Coin & Ghost Presents

No Exit [-19] 

A Digital, Quarantined Reimagining of Sartre’s Classic

Directed by Alex Demers & Zach Davidson

Presented on Zoom

Saturday, April 11, 2020 @ 6 & 8:30pm PST

Tonight!!! 

Coin & Ghost, LA’s theatrical home for remixed mythologies, will present its latest digital adventure, No Exit [-19], by Jean-Paul Sartre. With two performances on Saturday, April 11, 2020 (6:00 and 8:30pm PST), the performance takes Sartre’s classic and streamlines it, placing it directly in the context of today’s world: quarantine, Zoom, and a collective sense of existential dread. 

In No Exit [-19], three recently dead strangers find themselves trapped together in Hell, but it isn’t the Hell they had expected—no flames, no torture, no demons—just two other humans connected via Zoom, and some disappointing furniture. Over the course of the play, they come to discover that they have been confined together intentionally, that the three of them are so incompatible that Hell, for them, is just being trapped together for eternity. Co-directed by Coin & Ghost Artistic Director Zachary Reeve Davidson and frequent collaborator, Alex Demers, No Exit [-19] is a thoughtful, timely, and surprisingly funny take on the Hell we are all currently living in. For information and to join the Zoom call for the performance, please visit https://coinandghost.org/noexit19. Tickets are a suggested donation of $5, and half the proceeds will be donated to the Coronavirus Relief Fund.

The cast of No Exit [-19] is comprised of Davidson (Garcin), Jessica Antenorcruz (Inez), Elisa Rosin (Estelle) and Demers (Host). Choreography is by Rachael Caselli, with stage management by Niki Armato, technical rebellion by Will Cotter and documentation by Meredith Adelaide. The ambitious team is made complete with Coin & Ghost’s inner circle that includes its Managing Director Marguerite French, Associate Artistic Director Kendall Johnson and Director of Community Engagement Joseph Baca (with Davidson, Rosin, and Armato rounding out the admin team).

LINKS:

• No Exit [-19] info & tickets - https://coinandghost.org/noexit19 

• Coin & Ghost - https://coinandghost.org

• C&G Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/coinandghost

• C&G Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/coinandghost

• C&G Twitter - https://twitter.com/CoinAndGhost 

Michael's Musings

Quarantine & Chill
Michael Shinafelt

Hello from Quarantine, hope everyone is doing well and not going too stir crazy. I plan on staying in today all day. That's correct I will only exit my abode to collect my mail. That's it. 

If you're happy and you know it clap your hands, but if you aren't come with me to the other side...do it, I dare you!

Obviously I am having my weekly period, not my weekly exclamation point. That is all.

Hey Kids, don't stress about college at this point rehab is going to be harder to get into

Quarantine Movie of the week - Happy Death Day, lot's of fun!

Overheard: She's like the Yoda of pussy

Well, well, well if it isn't the consequences of your actions. Say "Hello" to them.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills premieres this coming Wednesday, there's that

A banana has 108 calories, a gin & tonic has 91, the more you know

Can't wait to spend another day alone with my F#cking thoughts

Woman Crush of the Week - Kristen Stewart who turns 30 today. I like her independent spirit.

Something to look forward to? Law and Order: SVU is on tonight

La da dee, La da dee doo, La da da me, La da da you, La da dee, La da dee doo, There's only me, There's only you...

Vengeance is a lazy form of grief

My soft boiled eggs are a travesty 

What pair of shorts shall I don today?

Find out here: 

https://www.instagram.com/michaelshinafelt/?hl=en

https://twitter.com/MShinafelt   

Taco Tuesday

Gangsta!
Fergie

One of the things that is missed during this time of quarantine is Taco Tuesday. While this was not a regular thing for me to engage in, I have done it. It's always a festive fun time with a pitcher of margaritas and good friends along for the ride.

So let's have a Taco Tuesday virtually, sort of, shall we? Let's join Fergie wearing the latest must have fashion accessory, the face mask, as she grabs some Taco Bell in Santa Monica, CA.

Yeah, not quite as fun as hitting your favorite Mexican Restaurant, but... 

There is a Taco Bell near me, so now I'm contemplating hitting it for some pseudo TT amusement. "Yes" Thank You Fergie, now I am going to pack on even more weight, Ugh!

Mic Drop!

Taco Tuesday on Wikipedia -

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Taco_Tuesday  

Mama Hair Monday

Hair
Gabrielle Union 

While in quarantine what's a Mom/Actress to do with her hair? in the immortal words of Elsa from Frozen "Let It Go" (PS weird I should reference that movie, since I have never seen it, really I haven't) - 

Thus like most people in the world at large Gabrielle Union took to her Instagram account and posted the above photo with her daughter stating: "See @kaaviajames mama's got hair like yours," 

Indeed she does. There are many things to love about Ms. Union, while she is talented and beautiful, she is also very down to earth. She is the mayor of keeping it real.

 So keep on keeping peeps and most of all stay safe! 

Follow Gabrielle on Instagram, like me!

https://www.instagram.com/gabunion/?hl=en

Walking In LA...

The Air That I Breathe
Lucy Hale

How's your quarantine going? Are you keeping your social distance y'all? Well something truly wonderful has happened despite how gnarly this is...the air quality in Los Angeles has been clean for weeks now.

That's correct minions, when go outside for a walk, run or whatever I am truly getting 100% verified fresh air! 😲

In fact it's so great outdoors these days I take really long walks, I'm kind of at loathe to go back indoors. Bare witness to Pretty Little Liars Lucy Hale, that smile on her face after exiting the grocery store isn't for naught. She, like me is vibing on the good clean air. I'm telling you it's real and it's spectacular.

In fact as soon as I exit the lap top I'm gonna go out and snort me some.

Mic Drop!

Fresh Air -
https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/fresh%20air

Hump Day & Chill

Bottoms Up!
Patsy Stone
(Joanna Lumley)

Quarantine, quarantine, quarantine that's all I ever hear, and with good reason. Of course along with this comes the usual plethora of catch phrases. Being as today is all about having a Hump Day & Chill, let's focus on the word Quarantini shall we? We shall!!!

Thus I have chosen the official Quarantini poster imbiber straight outta Absolutely Fabulous, Patsy Stone! Patsy, portrayed by actress Joanna Lumley could drink your Quarantini ass under the table. She could take the "Chill" in Hump Day & Chill to a whole other dimension, that's fer sure.

While I suggest you try to remain in this dimension, might I say enjoy your down time while you can, by partaking in your favorite adult beverage. Hey, it doesn't all have to be Quarantini's and olives. Personally my favorite thing is wine when I kick it. Chardonnay & Cabernet Sauvignon to be specific, and I just was.

Thus I hereby decree that today you Hump Day & Chill like Patsy Stone. That is all, WTF are you waiting for?! Hit the bottle & "Chill!"

Check out some Quarantini recipes here...
https://www.townandcountrymag.com/leisure/drinks/g31900654/quarantini-cocktail-recipes/