National Drink Wine Day

Booze!
Amy Schumer

As If! Anyone needed a special day dedicated to drinking wine, to actually imbibe, but here it is, today is National Drink Wine Day. Hey, I had some yesterday so I already have it covered.

Here with what looks like Chardonnay is National Drink Wine Day poster child Amy Schumer!!!

Amy is serious about her wine as you can see by the size of that glass, OMG!

While, I don't suggest you drink a glass of wine the size of Amy's, celebrate today the way you want. Hey, you do you...!!!

National Drink Wine Day on the WWW -

https://nationaldaycalendar.com/national-drink-wine-day-february-18/

Hump Day & Chill

Goodbye 2021
Sarah Michelle Gellar

It's the last Hump Day & Chill of 2021, that's correct Minions 2022 is just around the corner, this Friday to be exact...Yikes!

Thus headed into the new year I truly wanted something that made me feel chill. Sarah Michelle Gellar drinking wine in the great outdoors nails that vibe for me.

Visions of a year with more tranquility dance through my head imagining that I am there with her, right here, right now.

I am definitely with her in spirit that's for sure!

So Hump Day & Chill Sarah Michelle style. Say "Yes" to wine and the great outdoors, and reset yourself...you'll thank me later!

Sarah Michelle on IG -

https://www.instagram.com/sarahmgellar/?hl=en 

Hump Day & Chill

                                                                Join Him?

                                                            Hugh Jackman

I don't know about you but I really need a break from the world, and what better way to Hump Day & Chill than with some eye candy and wine, fer sure!!!

Thus we have Hugh Jackman imbibing in one of his favorite wines of the white variety. Mr. Jackman is a wine lover who is more about the brand than the type of grape he is consuming.

So here is the 411 on Hugh's favorite winery, it is, drum roll please....Hill of Grace Vineyards in Australia. No real surprise there since he is Australian, it stands to reason his favorite vineyard is there.

So let's follow Hugh's lead and Hump Day & Chill with some wine from our favorite vineyard, or in my case Two Buck Chuck from Trader Joe's. 

What's that? You want to bend it like Jackman? Well as luck would have it you don't have to be in Australia to lubricate with Hill of Grace, like everything else, you can visit them and order from them online.

Get to it Minions, I command you to Hump Day & Chill to you can't anymore!

Hill of Grace online -

https://www.henschke.com.au/vineyards/hill-of-grace/  

Hump Day & Chill

Bottoms Up!
The Queen

This week's Hump Day & Chill is fit for, well, a Queen, or King of your own personal domain, it's yours to choose. That's correct minions you have a choice. Choose wisely and you shall be rewarded...

I hereby present to you the Queen of England toasting to you and yours with a glass of  Windsor Vineyard English Quality Sparkling Wine Chardonnay. Say that three time fast, I double dog dare you.

Did you know the Queen had this wine brand? "Yes" the Queen pimps out her above mentioned wine brand, and quell surprise it regularly sells out. 

So give a cheer, and give a yell and Hump Day & Chill with the Queen because everyone wants a taste of Royalty, don't they?

Wine like a Queen, here -
https://www.windsorgreatparkvineyard.com/

Michael's Musings

Quarantine & Chill
Michael Shinafelt

Hello from Quarantine, hope everyone is doing well and not going too stir crazy. I plan on staying in today all day. That's correct I will only exit my abode to collect my mail. That's it. 

If you're happy and you know it clap your hands, but if you aren't come with me to the other side...do it, I dare you!

Obviously I am having my weekly period, not my weekly exclamation point. That is all.

Hey Kids, don't stress about college at this point rehab is going to be harder to get into

Quarantine Movie of the week - Happy Death Day, lot's of fun!

Overheard: She's like the Yoda of pussy

Well, well, well if it isn't the consequences of your actions. Say "Hello" to them.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills premieres this coming Wednesday, there's that

A banana has 108 calories, a gin & tonic has 91, the more you know

Can't wait to spend another day alone with my F#cking thoughts

Woman Crush of the Week - Kristen Stewart who turns 30 today. I like her independent spirit.

Something to look forward to? Law and Order: SVU is on tonight

La da dee, La da dee doo, La da da me, La da da you, La da dee, La da dee doo, There's only me, There's only you...

Vengeance is a lazy form of grief

My soft boiled eggs are a travesty 

What pair of shorts shall I don today?

Find out here: 

https://www.instagram.com/michaelshinafelt/?hl=en

https://twitter.com/MShinafelt   

Hump Day & Chill

Bottoms Up!
Patsy Stone
(Joanna Lumley)

Quarantine, quarantine, quarantine that's all I ever hear, and with good reason. Of course along with this comes the usual plethora of catch phrases. Being as today is all about having a Hump Day & Chill, let's focus on the word Quarantini shall we? We shall!!!

Thus I have chosen the official Quarantini poster imbiber straight outta Absolutely Fabulous, Patsy Stone! Patsy, portrayed by actress Joanna Lumley could drink your Quarantini ass under the table. She could take the "Chill" in Hump Day & Chill to a whole other dimension, that's fer sure.

While I suggest you try to remain in this dimension, might I say enjoy your down time while you can, by partaking in your favorite adult beverage. Hey, it doesn't all have to be Quarantini's and olives. Personally my favorite thing is wine when I kick it. Chardonnay & Cabernet Sauvignon to be specific, and I just was.

Thus I hereby decree that today you Hump Day & Chill like Patsy Stone. That is all, WTF are you waiting for?! Hit the bottle & "Chill!"

Check out some Quarantini recipes here...
https://www.townandcountrymag.com/leisure/drinks/g31900654/quarantini-cocktail-recipes/

Quarantine Coffee

 Looking for something fresh and fun during the theses days of Wine & Corona? Well Jonathan Bennett & Jaymes Vaughn are bringing it to ya in the form of their stay at home live talk show Quarantine Coffee.

Most of you remember Jonathan as Aaron Samuels from the iconic film Mean Girls. His co-host Jaymes is straight outta Celebrity Page TV on Reelz. Together they are hitting us with some much needed levity at a time and place where we all need it...bad!!!

"Yes" I have watched a few episodes and the thing I enjoy most about these guys is the accessibility and warmth they generate. They make you feel like you are imbibing in a cup of Quarantine Coffee right there with them. 

So, what are you waiting for?! Watch the first episode after the jump!

Make your cup runneth over with Quarantine Coffee at the link below...
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjTp6k3_wWa1Vcdcw47SWiA

Monday Motivation

I could really use some Monday Motivation today, as I have a slight hangover. This is the first time I had one in eons.

"Yes" I downed one too many glasses of wine last night, thus at present I am hitting the "hair of the dog" arf!

That's what I get for not monitoring my intake while viewing the Grammy's, of which I oddly enough remember the winners.

Honestly I thought Lizzo would take home more Grammy's than she did. I was also surprised at Billie Eilish winning as big as she did.

Que Sara Sara...now about that hangover, I am in major need of some Monday Motivation indeed!

Hangover on Wikipedia -
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hangover

Hump Day & Chill

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Monday Motivation

Here's Looking @ U
Michael Shinafelt

"Food, glorious food! Hot sausage and mustard! While we're in the mood -- 
Cold jelly and custard!" - Oliver!

"Yes" today's Monday Motivation is you guessed it, food! What I eat does not consist of any of the things mentioned above. Of course I am not a starving orphan being fed gruel. But I did play one in a musical production of Oliver! That's correct minions I was once a thespian. 

Moving onward, losing 50lbs is never easy for anyone, especially when you are in your 50's. Ya know 50/50 😛Thus one must do what they do food wise to drop the weight. Whilst that does not mean to starve thyself it does mean you can't eat hot sausage with mustard.

It means when you eat you have to do it clean and healthy. I would say stick to this pretty strictly in the beginning before you have cheat days. That's what I had to do at least. Once you lost a good amount of the ole' bulge then add the cheat day, but do not, I repeat, do not go overboard!

Also cut out, or simply cut back on drinking. I am wine type of dude who cut back. I like it in to cap off my day and would find it hard to completely kick it to the curb. Call it my cold jelly and custard.

Now get out there and get motivated minions!

Get healthy with me at:

https://www.instagram.com/michaelshinafelt/?hl=en

https://twitter.com/MShinafelt  

Hump Day & Chill

Don't Be A Drag, Just Be A Queen
Dita Von Teese

Since it is merely day two of 2019 I felt the need to Hump Day & Chill with something other than the usual flash of male skin. No, today is more of an alcohol sort of feeling, like a martini vibe all the way.

Usually I uncork some wine and rarely venture into hard liquor territory. That being stated I do like myself a martini from time to time of the gin variety. Recently I did imbibe in two of the delectable drinks during my friend Maresa's Birthday Celebration at the Saint Felix in Hollywood.

Oh martini it's been too long I must partake of thee more often than once in a fourth night. 

So with some help from burlesque bombshell Dita Von Teese raise a martini glass with me on this second day of the New Year and Hump Day & Chill... Now to the real question of today, one olive, or two?

Martini on Wikipedia:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Martini_(cocktail)

It's NYE 2018!

2018
Courtney Love

It's another year under our collective belts and another one to tackle. What are your hopes and dreams for 2019? 

My feeling is the years all bleed together and there is not one that is more special than the other. How do I celebrate New Year's Eve? I watch TV, drink wine and give zero F#cks. 

Thus for NYE I leave you with memes featuring two of my favorite female artists Courtney Love ringing out 2018 & Madonna ringing in 2019.

Process them anyway you like I don't give a F#ck! 

Happy New Year! 

2019
Madonna

Give zero F#cks with me at:
https://www.instagram.com/michaelshinafelt/?hl=en
https://twitter.com/MShinafelt

Monday Motivation

 Serving Little Edie Realness
Madonna

"Wine is bottled poetry" - Robert Luis Stevenson 

That's correct peeps my Monday Motivation is wine, and not the kind that people do when they are trying to get their way. That's not my kind of wine, my kind is the kind you drink from a glass and it makes you happy. 

Thus your Monday Motivation is to c'mon get happy. Smiles everyone smiles! Holiday cheer is here in the form of a big magnificent glass of squashed fermented grapes.

So join me, myself and fellow wine enthusiast Madonna and raise a glass, and give yell. It's Mother F#cking Monday! 

Only eight more days until Christmas, suck on that!

Wine on Wikipedia:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wine

Michael's Musings

Red, White & Black
Michael Shinafelt

This has been a weird week. How weird has it been Michael??? Well for starters...let me tell you about this glass of Chardonnay minus the black fly...

The heatwave, the heatwave, the heatwave

Yoga, it's a thing

How about those Crazy Rich Asians???

If you don't have something nice to say, come sit next to me and I'll write it up

Officially I am now a Vampire, the more you know

Pregnancy, that's not what tequila shots are for

Kelly Clarkson's daughter wants to marry Chris Martin - "Yes" this is a byline

I am really enjoying Very Cavallari - Kristin Cavallari is now one of my spirit animals 

What Meg?
Jason Statham

Jason Statham, Jason Stahtam, Jason Statham

Earth is the loneliest planet

Tackiest byline of the week - "Pink gets discharged from the hospital" think about it, but not too much

"I restore myself when I am alone" - Marilyn Monroe

Wine & Sleaze 

There's nothing better than ________ in the morning. I know my answer, what's yours?

The best things in life are naked

On that note, here I am, the one that you love at:
https://www.instagram.com/michaelshinafelt/
https://twitter.com/MShinafelt

Handsome Devil, John Stamos

The Devil & Miss Jones?
John Stamos & Date

While getting my WWW on, I happened upon this image of John Stamos looking deliciously tempting as the Devil. With an equally hot date at his side.

John is like a fine wine, he only gets better with age. Truth be told I never thought much of him when he was younger. It has only been recently that Mr. Stamos has been turning my head.

It's like he's Benjamin Button, the older he gets the younger he looks.

The next time I yield to temptation I am going to use the phrase "John Stamos made me do it!"

Happy Hump Day & Viva Satan!

John on Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/johnstamos/?hl=en   

T.G.I.F! It's Wine O'Clock!

Drink It Like Amy
Amy Schumer

Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale...OK, not really. But hey it's Friday and guess what that means? It's September 1st! Kidding, but it really is the 1st of September but that's not what Friday means. 

Friday always means it's wine o'clock, not all day, but at least in the evening. This particular one I am doing my monthly wine & nosh get together with my friend Scott Jacobs and boy am I needing it after the jacked week I have had and the truncated day that today is going to be!

Let's put it this way, they are spraying for bugs in my apartment today so I have to vacate for three hours. When I get home there will be a lot of cleaning up to do a chore I despise more then anything. Thus I get to spend my day getting things presentable for my evening. Good times...not!

Although I do not possess a wine glass as big as Amy Schumer's I am sure that my person will drink an amount of wine tonight that could fill a couple of those monsters. 

Damn! Get me to wine o'clock ASAP! 

Get with me on the gram:
https://www.instagram.com/michaelshinafelt/?hl=en

Michael's Musings

I'm Taking A Ride With...
Michael Shinafelt

It's Thursday and it's my time again. This week has been an interesting one. It made me contemplate about the things that drive me.

Well they are different from day to day, much like all of you I am sure. One day my focus is pushing myself further, other times it's lust, love, money or physical improvement. There is always of course peace with ones self which is the ultimate goal.

Oh, and sometimes I feel like Janet Leigh and go a little bit Psycho, and am the road to nowhere - hence the T-Shirt in the image this week. I know my skin images are much more popular on here, flesh will be returning next week. This week I decided to have some fun with an Instagram app this one.

Summary: Everything that drives me and all of you is random day to day, like this column. It's time let's play!

My refrigerator swings both ways

Cornrows are an important part of our diet

I know tongue talk

Truce? Now let's have some calamari

Justin Bieber cancelled his tour because he found God. Those wacky pot heads.

"Can't Get Enough" the latest video from Quiet Riot now fronted by American Idol alumni James Durbin, thoughts?

Kathy Griffin's house is up for sale. Karma.

Bigotry, just say no

When you wish upon a...fill in the blank

Brie is life! Don't judge me.

Traci Lords is on a roll!

Always remember a glass of Cabernet is always the key to victory

Drive with me at:
https://www.instagram.com/michaelshinafelt/?hl=en
https://twitter.com/MShinafelt    

Michael's Musings

I'm Going To Bridle You In & Make You Submit
Michael Shinafelt

Just finished off a delightful wine & nosh evening with my friend Scott Jacobs. We listened to the 80's music station on my cable TV and caught up, with a side of the usual mayhem.

I also laughed so hard my dick fell out of my shorts. Kidding about the dick falling out of my shorts part, I wanted to see if you were paying attention. 

Enough of my cheekiness, time to turn and face the strange. Hey it's a whole lot better than turning into the strange, or not. The decision is yours...

If I can smell your breath, you are too close

When in doubt get your monotone on with Jesus

Courtney Love is playing Kitty Menendez in an upcoming TV movie about the Menendez Brothers. Leaving this as is.

My Buddha is impressive, and yours?

Shooting the video for former Teen Idol Mike Clifford's cover of Louis Armstrong's What A Wonderful World this weekend. 

In space no one can hear you scream, in China too young is just a name

Look What I Made!

Started my healthy eating kick this week. Made myself some Brussel Sprout Tacos, which consist of Brussel Sprouts sauteed in garlic, stuffed into a corn tortilla with a dollop of sour cream. I've got skills bitches.

In light of Trump Care failing we should all take a moment and realize not everyone in the current administration is an insane narcissist bloated orange fart bag.

Lily Allen said it best, Fuck You very much

What an excellent day for an exorcism

Referring to the abovementioned Mike Clifford, check out his page and give it a like. Why? Because it will put a smile on your face and mine: https://www.facebook.com/Mike-Cliffords-Wonderful-World-878305508977287/

Remember, we were all once cream pies

Your mission should you choose to accept is is to follow me at:

https://www.instagram.com/michaelshinafelt/?hl=en
https://twitter.com/MShinafelt   

Did You Miss Us?

It's Party Time!
Kyle Richards & Lisa Vanderpump

In case any of you out there are having some Real Housewives of Beverly Hills yearning, like me, until the season six December 1st premiere on Bravo. Never fear Lisa Vanderpump and Kyle Richards are here!

The two were red as Rosea Wine while attending a party in  Puerto Vallarta, Mexico together. Guess they really have kissed in make-up.

The photo is courtesy of Ms. Richard's Instagram, with no clever caption to accompany it. C'mon Kyle with your sass I expected more from you!

Being that it is Friday and that the weekend is here I thought this was a groovy way to get the party started!

T.G.I.F!

Kyle on Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/kylerichards18/?hl=en 

Hump Day Inspiration: Amy Schumer

Don't Funk With Me!
Amy Schumer

Yeah this week has been a tough one, for me at least. Maybe not all of you, but I bet three quarters of you feel the way I do.

It's times like these great heaven knows, that I wished we had? Some wisdom perhaps? Levity? How about both?!

Here are ten great quotes from one Ms. Amy Schumer to get you over the mid-week blahs!

1)  “I’m probably like 160 pounds right now and can catch a dick whenever I want.” 

2) “I get labeled a sex comic. But if a guy got up onstage and pulled his dick out, everybody would say: ‘He's a thinker.’”

3) "That’s the Hollywood secret: Don’t put food in your dumb mouth!"

4) “Make sure he knows that you’re entitled to an orgasm. I like to say it. I’ll be like, ‘Hey, there are two people here.’ I’ll be like, ‘Oh my God, have you met my clit?’”

5) “We have to be a role model for these little girls, because who do they have? All they have really is the Kardashians ... And like, we used to have Khloé. Khloé was ours, right? Whenever there’s a group of women, you identify with one of them … Khloé, she lost half her body weight. She lost a Kendall! We have nothing. I want good role models.”

6) “The other day I was having some wine and some weed and an Ambien. Or, as I like to call it, ‘Tucking myself in.'”

7) “Beautiful, gross, strong, thin, fat, pretty, ugly, sexy, disgusting, flawless, woman. Thank you Annie Leibovitz!”

8) "I'm, like, newly famous, and it turns out it's not fun. Did you guys know that?"

9) “Just as good as the male comics: We put on our pants one leg at a time, just like them. And then we bleed in those pants."

10) “Please, please, take some photos. Isn’t that salad great? I’m wearing the shortest dress, you’re probably getting a photo of my clitoris right now.”

Amy is here for you on Instagram: 
https://www.instagram.com/amyschumer/?hl=en