Hump Day & Chill

Nikki Glaser

'Twas the Hump Day & Chill before Thanksgiving and what do I see? Why it's Nikki Glaser basting a turkey! Because of course Nikki uses turkey basters!

Honestly how much of a blast would it be to hang with Ms. Glaser on Turkey Day?! I ask you? On second thought, don't answer. I would want her all to myself she's so damn funny!

"Yes" Nikki is one of my favorite comedians from her Golden Globe hosting gig to her HBO Specials. Also let's not forget her notorious appearance as the host on Saturday Night Live recently.

She knows just how far to take something and still make it laughable.

Thus let's give a Hump Day & Chill toast to Ms. Nikki Glaser and her turkey baster...

Cheers!

Nikki Glaser on IG -

https://www.instagram.com/nikkiglaser/?hl=en 

Gobble, Gobble!

 

Happy Thanksgiving from Myself & Tiffany Valentine

PS She's carving the turkey, obviously 🦃

Gobble, Gobble!

Tiffany Valentine on Wikipedia -

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tiffany_Valentine  

Post Thanksgiving Wisdom

Regan MacNeil

I've noticed I've been posting a lot memes containing social commentary of late. Well here is something that I'm sure we all practiced yesterday, it being Thanksgiving and all, and should continue to do so.

"Live, Laugh Love" starring the darling possessed version of Regan (Linda Blair) straight outta The Exorcist. 

Hey, demonic possession is in vogue with the recent sequel to The Exorcist hitting theaters recently in October.

Using her for this particular staple of uplifting sayings is quite inspired if you ask me.

Seriously who knows how to "Live, Laugh, Love" better than a centuries old demon.

The Exorcist on Wikipedia -

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Exorcist   

Michael's Musings

Michael Shinafelt

Bork! Bork! Bork! If you know, you know.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Thanksgiving on Wikipedia -

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thanksgiving

Hump Day & Chill

Chelsea Handler

Today let's Hump Day & Chill to these sage words from Chelsea Handler. Being it is the day before Thanksgiving I felt this may be something many of us do, and or, need to hear.

"Yes" you heard me Minions some of you are not self aware enough out there to know this is about you. So stop being so vain and step it up and start engaging in this practice. Trust me it will make yours and others Thanksgiving (and other Holidays included) much more "Peachy Keen."

And isn't "Peachy Keen" something we should all aspire to? I believe in the power of this message.

So before you gobble, gobble take some Hump Day & Chill time to, well you know, do what Chelsea says.

Your family will Thank You, instead of wishing YOU had been served with stuffing!

Chelsea on IG -

https://www.instagram.com/chelseahandler/?hl=en  

Hello From The Other Side...Current Mood

Regina George
Mean Girls

Happy Post Turkey Day and such. If your like me Regina George best sums up the collective Current Mood out there.

As If! You aren't all feeling like sweatpants are all that fit you presently. Confess it, it's true!

Well I don't know about you, but after a satisfying TG I'm immediately back to watching what I eat. Yeah, I can flip a switch like that.

What's that you say? What did I eat? Well before I had TG dinner late afternoon early evening I indulged in this great individual flat bread sausage and mushroom pizza from Vons. Then the traditional TG dinner complete with pumpkin pie.

Thus today I shall don sweatpants...

Turkey Drop!

Mean Girls on Wikipedia -

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mean_Girls  

Michael's Musings

Happy Thanksgiving Minions! Gobble, Gobble...🦃

Hump Day & Chill

Let Them Eat...
Naomi Campbell

Tis the Hump Day & Chill before Thanksgiving. Being that Hump Day is a little sexy and that we gobble, gobble tomorrow I bequeath you Naomi Campbell serving up her special brand of Thanksgiving day dinner.

In fact Ms. Campbell looks to be one of the things on the menu being served all sprawled out among the desserts. Like she is perhaps sweet and delicious as well.

Well there you have it Minions your pre Turkey Day Hump Day & Chill with Naomi "Sugar Lips" Campbell.

Life can be so sweet on the sunny side of the street...

Naomi on IG -

https://www.instagram.com/naomi/  

Michael's Musings

Gobble, Gobble
Michael Shinafelt

Happy Thanksgiving and all that turkey stuff! Was thinking of blowing off my musings column today and merely posting a photo that wished everyone well, then I thought better of it. 

We all need my weekly dose of tomfoolery and commentary, just smile and nod your head "yes" - that's it, now keep reading. You just might find some things I am thankful for, might, I said...

Ever been so mad you punched your Thanksgiving turkey right in the a$$hole?!

Anyone watching the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade COVID style???

May all beings be happy 

Let's fantasize about control

I'm thankful for my trip to see my family in San Antonio earlier this month

Who, like me, completely feels The Weeknd was snubbed by by The Grammys, Bueller, Bueller, Bueller...

Remember the 2016 Election and how tight it was? Remember it took Hillary Clinton less than 24 hours to concede? We all know who the bitch baby is now, don't we Minions

I'm going to summon the dead - Dewit!

Woman Crush of the Week - Jennifer Lopez - Because she is 51 and smoking! Bask in the glory of the cover for her new single In The Morning, bask I said!!!

Time to lay my pimp hand down, yet again, hey someone has to do it

Ricky Schroeder, who knew?!?! 

Loving the Miley Cyrus/Dua Lipa collab Prisoner 

Joe Biden has now officially won the Presidency more times than anyone in History

What's on your Thanksgiving bingo card?

Find out what's on mine at -

https://www.instagram.com/michaelshinafelt/?hl=en

https://twitter.com/MShinafelt  

Michael's Musings

TBT: Life Is A Mystery
Michael Shinafelt

I recently arrived back home to Los Angeles after a groovy Thanksgiving spent with my family in Washington state. I got myself back to my roots and nature. Meaning "Yes" I went into the woods to visit my sister's cabin and bared witness to an amazing waterfall that I didn't chase.

Aren't I puny??? I thought so, time to do a 360 if you know what I mean. I'm guessing you do...

Wanna see me do a cartwheel? Asking for a friend.

There's a thing called ASCD (Attention Seeking C#nt Disorder) all of of us know someone who has it. I know the cure, ask me. 

Thus grant me hedgehog

Why hasn't someone patented the "Who Farted Sneer?"

"All of your missing socks are down here" - Satan 

I just wanna hear a good beat. It's the secret to life.

Just Because - Firemen have hoses

PSA: high fructose corn syrup is not an excuse for deranged behavior

Woman Crush of the Week - Kamala Harris brains, beauty, a potential Vice President slot. What's not to like?

Want an all day sucker? I've got one

Currently trending on Twitter: #TrumpIsALaughingStock DUH!

I want to be Denise Richards husband Aaron Phypers underwear

You had me fooled. You played a low rent whore like you were born into it

All men are the same you say? Well who told you to try all of them I ask???

Give it a name with me at:
https://www.instagram.com/michaelshinafelt/?hl=en
https://twitter.com/MShinafelt   

Michael's Musings

Doe Your Mama Know?
Michael Shinafelt

Happy Thanksgiving Minions! If you are a turkey and you get scared, does that make you a chicken?

BTW does your Mama know? 

If it she does hopefully it's with waffles and some Cabernet. I'm packing at present, take that however you want, time to tap Turkey Day!

I taste heaven from my knees, hope you do too!

Here comes the judge! (give it a name)

Einstein Speaking

It's that time of year again when Satan gets letters asking for presents from the dyslexic children

All men are the same! BTW Who told you to try all of them! 

Harry Morton passed at 38, Damn! 

Something I am thankful for is where I have been and where I am going. It's been a long uphill battle. If you hang in there it truly only gets better 😄

Fatal Attraction
Glenn Close & Michael Douglas 

In case you aren't doing turkey this Thanksgiving, try rabbit stew...

Kiss it goodbye, you ain't ever gonna get it again

Tease it to Heaven, spray it to Hell 

Time to get your Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade on! 

Woman Crush of the Week -Tina Turner just turned 80, Hail Queen!

"I am 100 percent sure that people who re-tweet their own tweets have also attempted to suck their own dick" - I 100% agree Whitney Cummings

Grab your booze and let's celebrate Thanksgiving!

There was that one time, well if you want to find out more, follow me at:
https://www.instagram.com/michaelshinafelt/?hl=en
https://twitter.com/MShinafelt  

Monday Motivation

Please Sir, I Want Some More
Red Wine

"Red red wine, It's up to you, All I can do, I've done" Red Red Wine, UB40

Guess what's happening now minions? Red, red wine of the Cabernet Sauvignon kind is what my Monday Motivation is. 

Hey, motivation is a mysterious thing, it can take on many forms, so sit right back and you'll hear a tale...

"Yes" red wine is my end game for Monday as I am having it with cheese and crackers as a little before Thanksgiving celebration with a friend tonight.

Any questions? I thought not, now carry on, that's all.

Say Cheese! 😺

Red Wine on Wikipedia

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red_wine  

Michael's Musings

Fit Over 50
Michael Shinafelt

What's new turkey gobblers, whoa, whoa, whoa - and the funk played on...

Happy Thanksgiving minions! I hope you have a groovy day. Me? Groove is in my heart, thus I am going to give you some of the things I am thankful for.

Things that shaped my life, things in the right here, right now & things that just make me smile like I have a naughty secret. Are you ready? Let's go!

I am thankful that I have lost 50 lbs & counting and am in kick ass shape @ the age of 52...!!!

"If you're not laughing, you're not living." - laughter

The films of Ken Russell, "yes" all of them

My love of horror movies

My family

The original Halloween in 1978 & the 2018 40 years later sequel

Tennessee Williams

Writing - it's my happy place

Acting, I have done that. Any questions? Ask.

"Live Through This" - Hole

Come On, Vogue!
Madonna

Madonna, Madonna, Madonna

My extended family

When I see the world through the eyes of a child

The privilege to be alive

After 52 years of living and learning this is just a small tip of the iceberg. There are a whole lot more things to be thankful for than this. These were merely a few of my favorite things. 

Choke your turkey today with me at:
https://www.instagram.com/michaelshinafelt/?hl=en
https://twitter.com/MShinafelt  

Hump Day & Chill

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Silly Saturday

Give Me A High C!
Neil Patrick Harris & David Burtka

Remember the 1988 movie Big starring Tom Hanks? Of course you might, or perhaps not...but if you do you will understand why this image of Neil Patrick Harris and his husband David Burtka dancing on the iconic FAO Schwarz piano in NYC is giving me life today, Saturday November 17th 2018.

Now mind you I have a sense of whimsy from time to time other days too. But it isn't a regular occurrence, so revel in this magic moment minions.

With Thanksgiving next week and then Christmas just around the corner I felt a Silly Saturday was in order. 

After all don't we all deserve it? Yes, yes we do!

Clap your hands together and repeat after moi "I Believe" 

NPH on IG -

https://www.instagram.com/nph/?hl=en  

Only In California

Itsy Bitsy Teenie Weenie
Laura Dern

How was your Thanksgiving? Well mine was sunny and the temperature was in the 90's. Yes, that's correct, no freezing of the ass for this guy and his fellow minions in the City of Angels. 

Thus I hereby bring you this photo of one of my fellow sun bunnies and favorite actresses, Laura Dern soaking up the sun in Malibu, wearing nothing more than a black bikini. 

Can you believe she is 50?! 

As someone who is 51, my take is age is just a number and you only get better not older. Laura is genuine proof of this. She recently slayed in HBO's Big Little Lies.

Now would someone please pass me the sunscreen? It's just another 90 degree day here in Los Angeles. 

Ciao!

Laura on IMDB:
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000368/?ref_=fn_nm_nm_1  

Michael's Musings

Would You Like a Leg? A Thigh? Or...
Michael Shinafelt

Let's start things off by wishing you and yours a Happy Thanksgiving. I sincerely thought about listing the things I am thankful for this week. Then I thought who the f#ck am I kidding?!

This Daddy is too authentic for that kind of BS! That does not mean you will not find gratitude in this Turkey Day column. It simply means I am keeping it real like I always do. Yep, it's business as usual my minions...gobble, gobble!

Tea Bags or Tea Bagging? Know the difference???

Every Thanksgiving I wonder: What do Victoria's Secret Models eat today?

For the record I copped a feel off Billy Idol's ass once

Oh Fang! "My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor." - Phyllis Diller

Sandy Zacky's "White Christmas" is a treasure, yep, it's Thanksgiving so listen to it, and listen to it now! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ueCuT6tB50E

There is always something there to remind me...of what? I don't know

R.I.P.
David Cassidy

David Cassidy passed away. I remember fantasizing hard about this Annie Leibovitz shot image of him from Rolling Stone. It's all about the pubic hair.

What? You want more Christmas? Damn! It's only Thanksgiving!!! OK, here you go Mike Clifford's rendition of "The Christmas Song" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_2v214rx7AE

Alright, I will tell you WTF I am thankful for. My friends, my family, my life. The usual suspects.

My advice to anyone? No matter what, keep smiling. Even if you aren't happy it's contagious and has the power to disturb others.

Something I would be thankful for? Anything that would truly make America great again instead of this dictatorship I did not vote for.

On that note, I am thankful turkey has Trytophan, sleep it does a body good

Today will be glorious, I am loving a day with nothing to attend to, except eating!

Boxing is my new jam!

Get on your knees and thank me at:

https://www.instagram.com/michaelshinafelt/?hl=en
https://twitter.com/MShinafelt

Hitting The Tinsel, Gwen Stefani

Be Your Own Ornament!
Gwen Stefani

Since Thanksgiving draws nigh and is officially/unofficially the start of Christmas, yes I said the start of Christmas, because lets face it Christmas is truly more than a day in December it is one long _______ fill in your own blank.

While many of you turkey gobblers will be hitting the bottle this weekend, witness one Gwen Stefani at the Empire State Building tree lighting ceremony, hitting the tinsel as it were. That's correct minions while most of you are keeping Christmas at bay by drinking the pain away this weekend Gwen is embracing it by dressing like a tree ornament so her and the tinsel are one.

Gee you'd never know she has a holiday CD to promote bearing the ominous title You Make It Feel Like Christmas, now would you???

Give in to your inner tinsel desires and bend it like Gwen, be your own tree ornament damn it!

Gwen on Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/gwenstefani/?hl=en  

Zero F#cks Monday

She's Got The Look
Erika Jayne

The less said about last night's American Music Awards the better. The AMAs felt like a fast food menu, you partake but there is no real satisfaction. 

While combing through red carpet photos this morning one of the images stood out for me, the one of Erika Jayne slaying with a that's, well, so Erika. Also because Season 8 of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills draws nigh. 

The premiere date is etched in stone in my brain. Why you might ask? Because it is the day after my Birthday. "Yes" the RHOBH premiere date is Tuesday December 19th, the day of my birth is Monday December 18th. Got it? I know you do. So I guess that means Bravo is giving me their present a day late, bastards!

So here it is me giving zero f#cks the Monday before Thanksgiving about the AMA's because, well they were boring AF!

Cheers!

Follow Erika Jayne on Instagram, like me, at:
https://www.instagram.com/theprettymess/?hl=en  

Mannequin Madness!

Taylor Swift, Todrick Hall & Friends

How was everyone's Black Friday? If you descended into madness and went shopping I hope you got what you wanted and your body parts are still intact. If you are not insane, like me, you stayed home and ate some more, woot!

Something that has been a thing of late is the Mannequin Challenge. I have seen so many videos posted on Facebook & Instagram of friends & family taking it over the Thanksgiving Holiday, good times!

Well you just know Taylor Swift along with her friends and family would not be left out, and of course try to one up everyone else by striking a pose on the beach in the chill of fall. It was all captured for her Instagram page, naturally.

She along with Todrick Hall who is starring in Kinky Boots on Broadway took on Turkey Day and the cold to pose like a mannequin below. Hey standing still on a cold deserted beach sounds like a saner idea than going to an overcrowded mall with shoppers clawing for bargains...

Check it out after the jump!

Taylor on Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/taylorswift/?hl=en